She Didn’t Wait for Life to Get Better — She Lived It; Healing Was Optional. Faith Was Not

Picture this: a woman lies in bed planning an entire household move. Movers carry boxes past her, and she points to where they should go. She hasn't walked in months. The next day, her family drives her to Hawaii for a vacation they've saved up for years. They sat her on the beach and played around her while she watched. Then a phone call changes everything. A doctor in Portland has an opening. She goes in a wheelchair. She walks out. Her family leaves the wheelchair behind. In this episode of the Why We Believe show, host Nathan Gwilliam sits down with wife, Crystal Gwilliam, of 27 years to hear her story of faith, miracles, and learning to savor moments as the molecules of eternity.

What makes her account so significant is not just the suffering she has endured, but the joy she has chosen despite decades of unanswered questions. Her story challenges everything we think we know about healing, faith, and finding peace when life doesn't make sense. For 27 years, she has battled chronic illness that no doctor has been able to explain. Countless tests, countless specialists, countless treatments. They always find something wrong but never the root cause. She's had brain surgery that cost her 70% of her field of vision. She's been bedridden for months at a time. She uses a wheelchair. And through all of it, she has raised her three daughters, supported her husband, and built a family with faith and love in Jesus Christ.

 A Sanctuary on the Top Bunk 

Crystal's journey with Christ didn't begin in a chapel or at a conference. It began on the top bunk of her childhood bedroom in Yuma, Arizona. She was 14 years old, isolated at a high school with a very few Latter-day Saint students. Her parents had decided she couldn't attend the school where most of the LDS kids went. She had no close friends. She didn't feel like she belonged anywhere. Her family would gather in the evenings to watch television, but it did nothing for her. She was searching for something more. So her top bunk became a sanctuary. She started diving into the scriptures, particularly the Book of Mormon. That year, Jesus Christ became real to her. She couldn't explain it tangibly, but she knew she was no longer walking through life alone. That experience changed how she viewed everything.

Early morning seminary played a major role in her faith development as well. Studying the Old Testament at 6:10 in the morning wasn't easy, especially when she was often the only student awake. But her teacher, Brother Wilcox, brought the stories of Isaiah, Jeremiah, Genesis, and Moses to life. She learned what it looked like to live a life with God. She saw prophets go through hard things and watched how God showed up as a God of miracles. Those lessons became her foundation when her own hard things arrived.

 When the Hard Things Came 

At 16, Crystal's appendix ruptured. Doctors say she's lucky to be alive. About eight months later, she collapsed while flying kites on a date. Her boyfriend had to carry her home. That moment marked the beginning of a journey filled with unknowns that continues to this day. Doctors have never been able to identify the core reason for her chronic pain. Every time they run tests, they find something wrong, but never the thing that explains why her body doesn't work the way it should.

Some suggested the pain might be psychosomatic. Psychological evaluations ruled that out. The mystery remains unsolved. In 2020, she had brain surgery after losing 70% of her field of vision. Her body requires constant rest. She compares it to an old iPhone with a battery that drains every few hours. She has to recharge constantly just to function. But despite these limitations, she has raised three daughters with her husband Nathan, building a home centered on faith.

 Molecules of Eternity 

When the Gwilliam's moved to Rexburg about 13 years ago, Crystal became bedridden shortly after. But this time felt different. As she and Nathan counseled together, they had remarkable experiences with the Spirit that shifted their entire perspective. Long before President Nelson's "think celestial" message, they came to understand that this life is just a moment. It's not their full existence. A quote from Elder Neal A. Maxwell became their anchor: Moments are the molecules that make up eternity. The Spirit impressed upon Crystal to savor the moments. At the time, their daughters were in the thick of activities and growing up. Nathan was building businesses.

Crystal realized she didn't want to miss out on these moments, even from bed. She also realized there were things she needed to let go that were holding her hostage, like grieving the things she couldn't do anymore. The couple made a conscious shift. Instead of spending all their time and energy chasing healing, going to doctors, and being let down, they decided to enjoy today. Their lives stopped being about waiting for some future healing and started being about living fully in the present. That shift brought far more joy into their home.

 The Portland Miracle 

Crystal's brother became a doctor later in life and has been a constant advocate in her search for answers. While she was bedridden, he was reading a book that mentioned a doctor in Portland who had developed a system using micro frequency currents. On a whim, he called her office. The doctor seldom answered her phone, but she picked up that day because she was expecting an important overseas call. Miraculously, the doctor had a four-hour opening the day after the Gwilliam's were returning from a family vacation in Hawaii. They had flown out of Portland because it was the cheapest flight. They were already going to be there at exactly the right time.

Crystal went into that appointment in a wheelchair. After the treatment, she walked to the bathroom on her own. Her oldest daughter hovered nervously, ready to help, but Crystal did it herself. The family sobbed. They left the wheelchair at the doctor's office. That's how confident they were that God had provided a miracle exactly when they needed it. Crystal is quick to point out that God has shown up like this not just with her physical challenges, but with business struggles, finances, and their children. He has always been there.

 The Gift of Lifting Others 

Crystal developed her gift for lifting others because she experienced so much hard and wished someone had seen her. When people finally did show up and let her know she was loved, it left a deep impression. Now she asks God to help her have eyes to see, ears to hear, hearts to understand, and hands to do His work. As her health has continued to fluctuate, she has learned to serve differently. Sometimes the most powerful thing she can do is share a smile, offer a hug, or simply listen.

People come and sit with her, pour out their hearts, and she lets them know they were heard, seen, and loved. She doesn't have to fix anything. Just being present is enough. Nathan adds that Crystal has been his greatest support during the hardest moments of his business career. When things fell apart, she didn't criticize or blame. She rolled up her sleeves and asked how she could help. Her strategic mind and gift for systems helped him through moments he couldn't have survived alone.

 Choose Your Own Transformation 

Crystal Gwilliam's journey reveals that faith isn't about getting all the answers or being healed on our timeline. It's about choosing joy despite the unknowns and trusting that God sees the whole picture even when we can't. Her story challenges us to examine whether we're waiting for life to get better before we start living, or whether we're savoring the moments right now. Consider whether you've been holding yourself hostage to things you can't control.

Crystal's breakthrough came not when doctors finally solved her mystery, but when she stopped letting unanswered questions steal her present joy. Your own circumstances might look different, but the principle remains: God shows up when we trust Him, often in ways we never expected. Take time to ask God for eyes to see and ears to hear. The people around you might need to be lifted, and you might be the angel God sends. Sometimes, our hardest seasons become the training ground for our greatest gifts.

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